This is not a place to promote your podcast. He would shed actual tears when we would sit together watching movies or just cuddling on the couch, and I would think geez how damaged are you that this moment means this much? Something in my gut turned. Mine was all mental, so I minimized it because outwardly it didnt appear as dramatic as others stories. New comments cannot be posted and votes cannot be cast. The busyness is all valid things like 3 jobs, a consistent fitness routine, family relationships, etc but before I know it, 3 weeks have gone by and the person that blessed me with these jobs and incredible community (literally everything I was just asking Him for) hasnt heard from me and thats all He wants. I was watching Richard Grannons youtube video on Covert Narcissists and found it to be one of the most well-rounded explanations Ive seen. Please God, if you have any mercy dont let her catch the pianissimo she overlooked. When Sara Lewis shared her story on a podcast, she didnt think of herself as brave. But when her story went viral, she quickly learned what it meant to be in the spotlight. This is my favorite podcast. And if youre hearing Saras story for the first time, wellyoure in for a wild ride!Show Notes:Something Was Wrong Podcast (Saras story is Season 1)Follow Sara @spaceandpurposeFollow Kaitlin @kaitlingraceelliottFollow SWE @so.what.elseKaitlins Website. Here are some notes I took and their associated memories: This is all a spectrum of a disorder. Seeing our potential and discovering what were truly capable of. That dude needs major help. Dick is an abuser -- but also isn't Sara's family dynamic a bit intense? Choosing peace that blatantly opposes the storm around them. Something Was Wrong with Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) EPISODE 83 Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) joins us on SWE for a long chat about a past relationship that took a crazy turn. I closed the door and sat down, turning the fan and faucet on so he wouldnt hear me crying and praying. He also called people out and shocked a culture by giving women a voice. It wasnt until hours later, at dinner (I still remember the really cool Asian restaurant we discovered in Oakland), that he tilted his head like a parent would toward a child and said, When are you going to talk to me about what you saw earlier today? The weirdest conversation proceeded. Is it time yet? reviewed: Something Was Wrong Love the podcast. Forward to that night lying in bed: I was contemplating the existence of mankind (I know; Im not kidding) and I straight up wondered, Why? Was there truly nothing but you, God, and you decided all of THIS was a good idea? The Bouge family narrowly escaped the Jonestown massacre November 18, 1978. We were at Blue Bottle in Oakland when he called someone fat out loud well within earshot of that person, and I began scanning the doors for my exit strategy. I think that sums up my most recent thoughts in the recovery process, but I went a tad further and wrote things out on the flight to Nashville last weekend since Im trying to get better at sharing my process and the annual renewal fee for this website just hit my bank account. But that song that plays at the intro and the end. Have you asked yourself why something just feels inexplicably wrong, confusing, and overwhelming? We belong to Him. Learn more about your ad choices. You will be inundated with why I love this company and my job. Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) (@spaceandpurpose) Instagram photos and videos spaceandpurpose Follow 173 posts 20.6K followers 207 following Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) Personal blog Health, beauty, funny things Coming January '23: the S&P Podcast! r/podcasts: a subreddit to discover, discuss, and review podcasts with other podcast enthusiasts. Amazing how long it took for the truth to sink in! I must have looked nuts, laughing and assuring him Id never been better while he tilted his head and looked at me, asking if I was ok. The idea of him turning right back around seemed ludicrous. I laughed and cried all the way home, using the experience to learn how to trust my gut and we both moved on to live our best lives.). The busyness is all valid things like 3 jobs, a consistent fitness routine, family relationships, etc but before I know it, 3 weeks have gone by and the person that blessed me with these jobs and incredible community (literally everything I was just asking Him for) hasnt heard from me and thats, This is often why I believe He allows hardship- not that He is the direct cause of bad or difficult times, but His nearness is undeniably different when were in pain and we. Their stories will be told in an episodic format meaning more inspiring stories and less cliffhangers. (Sometimes a ray of light just looks like a good lunch.). See Episode 8 of the Something Was Wrong Podcast: There is Much to Confess.. Until the week before her wedding when she learned - something was. Discount automatically applied at checkout, Book Review: A Story of Alcoholism, Pain, and Hope after Loss. Eight days out, I was ready to move forward at full speed, thinking a wedding was the answer to serious problems. (Im generalizing. Love is what rescued me. Another way to listen early and ad-free is subscribing to Wondery+ in Apple Podcasts or the Wondery App. Yes! (If girls were single, they were waiting. I was preparing to become the helpmeet my dream guy was looking for, instead of calling it living my dang life.). (Many of which Im still figuring out a year later.) I guess chicks that write have blogs now, so thats me. Genuinely curious), especially in light of his critical comments on alcohol. I thought they were deleting all comments identifying him? He agreed to wait it out a little bit but things were precarious. *Content warning: Substance Use Disorder, emotional abuse, sexual assault, workplace abuse. With opening the eyes of anyone who reads this and needs it, because your freedom and empowerment matters. I asked myself, what must I be doing wrong if my own fiance doesnt trust me with his secrets? I was mortified over the tears that forced their way down my face all over again, and now the shame and embarrassment made me feel like a little kid. The story is told on a podcast called Something Was Wrong. Coming to a podcast near you that will knock your winter socks off. According to the DSM-5, traits of APD include: I was flippantly told multiple stories from his childhood about rebellion, lying, and getting in trouble with authority. Neither can you. During the second half, I had the opportunity to sit in the audience and feel their engagement. I still believed some literal lies told that needed time to unravel to see everything clearly, even after finding out they were lies. It doesnt have to impress anyone elsewhich I wrestle with. Requires subscription and macOS 11.4 or higher. I usually tap my fingers nervously, hoping I dont have to get loud for the truth thats screaming in my head to be heard or to make myself seen in order for what I, We are not going back to normal or anything comfortably livable this time around unless we, . S1 E2: It Was Weird. So how quickly did I choose other things once church was canceled? Time slowed down as I heard yelling and watched what felt like a movie scene. My family was never like this but these people remind me of a lot of families I grew up with at church. Its easy! He responds. I enjoyed my life and MYSELF when this tall man dressed in a red suit holding a pitchfork showed up at my door and asked if I wanted to lose it and see myself as worthless. Just when I thought Id pulled everything I could from a single passage, shed tell me I was cutting a note short and to let it breathe. The people we surround ourselves with are who we will reflect, so hopefully were all chasing something that freaks us out on some level. The more conversations Im having with people in similar situations, the more amazed I am by their resiliency and strength. I was told this past week that when were wearing rose-colored glasses, red flags just look like flags. When my story is released to the public, in all its true-crimey-ness, Im thrilled to know that it will ultimately point to the miracle He did in rescuing me. It was healing, though, to go back to the beginning and understand how I could have fallen for such an insidious trap. If you're sensitive to the topic of abuse, I would skip it. if that's what it takes to get my daughter to see clearly. Bear with me as this site goes through growing pains. Aside from writing, music, Frenchie videos and seeing the world, I also love learning about how to care for my health naturally. He sees farther than we do. Sara Gonzalez (Lewis) joins us on SWE for a long chat about a past relationship that took a crazy turn. The series is told through the lens of the survivor so if you aren't Every breezy, golden memory now had the word FRAUD painted in red. Jesus did all this so we could be restored to our Father. 1:54:06. Literally the only podcast other than Bloody Happy Hour Podcast that I have listened to every episode and I cant wait each week for the newest episode to drop! The survivor stories are brave and valuable, but the hosts commentary at the top of episodes is downright irresponsible. Im thankful for this past year, because my God is quickly turning a dark time completely around into something beautiful. If you could see what I see. (I realize not everyone reading this shares my beliefs. Humans are hardwired to need a vision, a hope of something more, something bigger than ourselves to invest in and be part of. We never watched a movie with my roommate because that time was spent talking in my room. Dipping my toes in some frigid waters!) I want my friends to feel safe. Not on the next repeat, though. Something Was Wrong is an Iris Award-winning true-crime docuseries about the discovery, trauma, and recovery from shocking life events and abusive relationships. It still irritates me. He doesnt want a casual connection- He wants our fire, our very worst AND best. It was a miraculous instance of God opening the eyes of one of His own whod been deceived into choosing a dangerous situation. Morbid is a true crime, creepy history and all things spooky podcast hosted by an autopsy technician and a hairstylist. He is extremely active on social media, especially Twitter, and he would fly into picking fights and arguments that he would gleefully show me, especially around Christian topics. Thank goodness, because without their constructive input, I never would have taken a good hard look at things and asked myself what I could have done differently! We have felt like square pegs in round holes because the fit didnt exist until now. And her family is definitely extracan you say ENMESHED PARENTING.but to each his own. What a messy time to be alive.). Looking back, until my current love, no one was really worth it. Happy to be an "enmeshed parent." When I saw Something Was Wrong in Apple's "Purple Podcast App" (as Lindsey Chrisley always refers to it on Coffee Convos), I thought I'd listen to one episode just to see what it was about.It was previously an Audiochuck production, but is now part of Wondery / Amazon Music.. With a Wondery+ subscription, episodes are ad-free which really makes listening to podcasts enjoyable - and fast. *Content warning: Physical and sexual violence, rape. Holding on to hope, whether for their spouse or for the sake of their kids, many stay. All I remember is apologizing just to end the mess, him chuckling at my overreacting while continuing to fold clothes, and our night moving on. It was a scary piece for me. Listen to Season 9 of Something Was Wrong now and subscribe to hear the next chapter of their story every Thursday. 6h. ), Through that book, God mended me in ways I never expected and might previously have resisted had I not been desperate for something to tell me who I really was and why all of me was important. That the ground beneath our feet doesnt feel the same and were somehow powerless against it? Her family is AWFUL!! Ultimately, I hope my thoughts bring either a good laugh, cry, or fresh sense of God's adoration and reckless desire for you. Enough to let go and be free. 3 for any nerds curious.) What will we attempt when we no longer see our lack, but His potential? The old man is dead. . Create an account to follow your favorite communities and start taking part in conversations. He had an explanation as to why Bryan had sent him an electronic copy for safe-keeping in case the hard copies got lost in the mail, but his point was my failure in how I handled the situation. Responded as if I could do no wrong because he was in awe of everything. The story is told on a podcast called Something Was Wrong. Charts. In a healthy relationship, how does a typical child run to their dad? We support artists from around the world, who create works speaking to inclusion, feminism, equality, wellness, and other important social issues to both promote diversity in media & spread ideas that encourage openness. Podcast Discovery . A docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Their stories will be told in an episodic format meaning more inspiring stories and less cliffhangers. I froze and watched as he swiftly closed it with a few keystrokes, his face expressionless. They pointed out how it was technically inaccurate because it was taken out of context. Ive seen friends I grew up with walk away from church and I firmly believe this had a lot to do with it. This scenario doubles as an example of gaslighting: He was folding clothes by my bed one evening and said, Well Id never share a secret with you. I paused what I was doing and looked up, surprised, wondering where he was going with this. [Valentina] Wait, Youre Supposed to Help Me. He always meets me. He finally has our full attention. Bravery is a choice of action regardless of fear being present. Everything looked guaranteed until they went a different direction. How will we live? What do I mean? Use the prompts, write for 5-20 minutes each day and youll be amazed at how quickly you make progress on your book. My brain hurt and I wondered if Id found its capacity when I was informed that it was now time to change the physical look of my hands while they were doing the impossible. Instead of the thorn shall come up the cypress; instead of the brier shall come up the myrtle; and it shall make a name for the Lord, an everlasting sign that shall not be cut off.. Is that person you met online really telling the truth? Welcome to a spiritual war. Still in the first season of it, and was instantly hooked after the first episode. Youre easier to read than you think. 12/22/2022. Seriously, DONT. Yikes. Recommended by us. Ad-free epis I know where my heart was. S1 E7: We're Done, I'm Running, You're Insane, S1 E9: Unencumbered by the Weight of Women. When Sara got engaged she thought she was marrying the Christian man of her dreams. My experience just has a little Dateline flair. Something Was Wrong is an award winning docuseries podcast about the discovery, trauma and recovery of being engaged to a sociopath. Read reviews and listen to Something Was Wrong on Chartable. Suns finally out, am I right?, Me: Oh! Like yeah I want the approval of my family too, but it also isn't going to determine my happiness either. You know how you can buy a car you never knew existed, and suddenly you notice them everywhere? With our spiritual buffets closed down, those who know how to fuel themselves from the Word, sending their roots down deep to find the truth in bedrock when it feels elusive are having to. !" bc wanna Google the MF. Pretty dang quickly. (IM SORRY JOHN & STACI I blatantly judged your book by its cover. I have a hard time separating my ideas of others dreams for me vs. my dreams for myself. On a small scale, Ill do a mental scan of my upcoming week. It costs relationships. This is not your story, you do not get to have . This is a really great podcast that delves into very important issues. I thought they were deleting all comments identifying him? Just forcing myself to share the good, badand ugly because it does coexist, but all bad, ugly things make Gods goodness shine brighter in contrast. When Sara Lewis shared her story on a podcast, she didn't think of herself as "brave." But when her story went viral, she quickly learned what it meant to be in the spotlight. Press J to jump to the feed. There's a special place in hell for that guy. If its a hectic one or has something Im not looking forward to, Ill reach further and look for a break in the clouds to set my sights on, and let that ray of light keep me focused. For some reason, he threw on a fake New Jersey accent and waved his hand flippantly as he said, Yeah! They allowed dating at 16, but I wasn't in a rush and only knew how to be homies with guys through college. I think they sort of gave up policing people. and all the trees of the field shall clap their hands. I was so excited for an entire weekend with a couple of my favorite people! 10 no. This discounts and erases the experiences of male victims of all ages, as well as female victims who have been abused by other females and males who have been abused by males. (I remember a breakup years ago where I showed up to his house ready to set us both free, and when he immediately called it, I threw him off by breathing a huge sigh of relief and saying oh thank God through happy tears. Thank goodness, because without their constructive input, I never would have taken a good hard look at things and asked myself what I could have done differently! Beautiful day. The things this man put her and her family through is so intriguing and heartbreaking. Publishers. It makes no sense to outside observers; it can even appear counterintuitive to fight fear with stillness. 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